Symptoms of Sexual Abuse

GROOMING HAPPENS

WATCH FOR THE SIGNS

HOW IT HAPPENS

  • The child or young person is targeted. While any child can be sexually abused, some perpetrators may target children that are particularly vulnerable. For example, children and young people that are socially isolated or are part of a marginalised social, economic, racial or cultural group.
  • Building trust. Perpetrators often present as trustworthy, reputable, generous, and likeable, and may build a child or young person’s trust through special attention or gifts. In some situations, whole families or organisations can be groomed as a result of the perceived trustworthiness of a perpetrator.
  • Isolation. Perpetrators may progressively isolate a child or young person from supportive family and friends, and may seek to fill roles in a child or young person’s life that provide practical or emotional support.
  • Sexualisation. Perpetrators may gradually introduce sexualised content or discussions to a child or young person in order to normalise this behaviour. They will often then exploit this to encourage or coerce the child to engage in sexual activity, produce child sexual abuse imagery or participate in sexualised in-person or virtual chats. This behaviour may escalate slowly or quickly.
  • Control. Perpetrators often use secrecy, shame, blame, coercion and threats to maintain control in order to perpetuate the abuse and ensure the child or young person’s silence.

SIGNS TO WATCH OUT FOR 

  • developing an unusually close connection with an older person
  • having gifts or money from new friends or someone that they cannot account for
  • being very secretive about their phone, internet or social media use
  • going missing for long periods of time
  • appearing extremely tired, including at school
  • being dishonest about who they have been with and where they have been
  • substance misuse
  • assuming a new name, having false identification, a stolen passport or driver licence, or a new phone
  • being collected from school by an older or new friend

TIPS TO KEEP THEM SAFE

  • understand safe and unsafe behaviours and situations, including being able to identify early warning signs and their body's natural reactions when they feel unsafe, worried, or scared. These may include feeling butterflies, and having sweaty palms and a racing pulse
  • practice safe online behaviour, including deleting and blocking requests and messages from people they don't know, and reviewing and updating privacy settings
  • know what to do and who to talk to if something feels uncomfortable, as well as what support services are available if they are unsure or if something has happened
  • say no to requests to engage in unsafe behaviors or sexual advances
  • block unsafe users, make a complaint to social media companies and report online grooming
  • understand body boundaries, respectful relationships and consent
  • feel safe and protected when disclosing what is happening to them.

LOOK FOR THE SIGNS

Symptoms 

Children of Sexual Abuse

It's RARE for a child to Disclose ABUSE 
they do not have the vocabulary to let you know what happened
watch for signs  
SEE something?  SAY something... 
IT'S THE LAW

PHYSICAL SIGNS 

  • headaches
  • stomach aches
  • bed-wetting
  • change in appetite
  • bulimia
  • weight loss
  • nightmares and sleep disturbances
  • bruises on soft parts of the body, like buttocks or thighs
  • changes in the genital area, such as redness, swelling or discharge
  • sexually transmitted infections
  • pain or burning when going to the toilet, including frequent urinary tract infections

BEHAVIORAL SIGNS

  • depression, anxiety and mood changes, including social withdrawal and disassociation
  • sudden disinterest in previously enjoyed activities
  • self-harm or suicidal ideation
  • poor self-care or personal hygiene
  • harmful and volatile substance use
  • over-compliance and eagerness to please
  • aggressiveness and anger
  • running away
  • sexual knowledge or activity that is inappropriate for their age
  • overly sexualised behaviours, including towards other children or adults, dressing in highly sexualised ways or mimicking sexual activity during games
  • drawings or descriptions that are sexually explicit and not age appropriate
  • early or excessive use of pornography
  • displaying intense fear or discomfort if topics related to sex (including child sexual abuse) are raised
  • desexualisation – for example, wearing baggy clothes to hide their gender
  • anxiety-related illnesses such as anorexia or bulimia
  • unusual or new fears, such as avoidance of certain people and places, being alone or being close to others
  • asking questions or making references to secrets and unusual ‘games’.

Signs of ONLINE Child Sexual Abuse

  • a sudden change in use of technology, including spending a lot more or less time online, texting, gaming or using social media
  • being secretive about online activities, including who they are interacting with and where they spend time using their devices (for example, going to another room)
  • using devices at unusual hours
  • secretly creating new accounts
  • becoming distressed after receiving notifications
  • becoming panicked about losing access to their device
  • talking about a new friend or someone they met online
  • making comments that hint something may have happened online, such as asking questions about whether parents can see what they do online.

SYMPTOMS OF SEXUAL ABUSE IN TEENS

AbuseRS  are most often family members or people you and your child know well.

CHANGES IN EMOTIONS

  • quieter or more distant than usual
  • cries for no obvious reason
  • starts to wet the bed or soil their pants
  • asks questions like ‘Do people have to keep secrets?’
  • is aggressive or seems angry for no obvious reason
  • becomes unusually eager to please
  • loses interest in activities they usually enjoy
  • is clingy.
  • seems scared 
  • depression
  • anxiety

CHANGES IN BEHAVIORS

  • no longer interested in playing or avoids particular places or people
  • behaving in sexual ways that aren’t appropriate for their developmental stage or age
  • having difficulty falling or staying asleep, having nightmares, sleeping a lot, or wanting to sleep near others
  • eating more or less than usual and is gaining or losing weight
  • doing less well at school
  • reluctant to look after their personal care and hygiene
  • using language that is sexual or explicit
  • behaving like a younger child.
  • dressing differently
  • wearing new clothing or shoes, or using bags, jewellery or electronics they can’t or won’t explain
  • engaging in harmful sexual behaviour, including risky sexual activity
  • spending a lot of time online and being secretive about their online activity and communications
  • eating differently
  • having difficulty falling or staying asleep, having nightmares, or sleeping too much.
  • self-harm
  • dangerous activies

CHANGES IN EMOTIONS

  • aggressive or seems angry for no apparent reason
  • getting angry, upset or fearful when a particular person or place is mentioned
  • having trouble developing or maintaining relationships
  • crying for no obvious reason
  • showing signs of low self-esteem
  • depression
  • confused about their sexual identity

CHANGES IN SCHOOL/SOCIAL LIFE  

  • avoiding particular people or places, like a friend’s house or a sports group
  • avoiding activities or events that they previously enjoyed, or asks questions like ‘Do I have to go to music today?’
  • doing less well at school.
  • spending more time on their own than usual
  • hanging out with different people

PHYSICAL SIGNS

  • swelling, bruising, bleeding, redness or irritation in the genital area
  • pain or discomfort when going to the toilet
  • difficulty walking or sitting
  • has headaches or stomach aches with no obvious physical causes
  • bruises on soft parts of their body, like buttocks or thighs
  • repeated urinary tract infections
  • symptoms of a sexually transmitted infection, like discharge from the penis or vagina
  • signs of pregnancy.

MANEFESTATIONS IN ADULTS

Many Adults Block out their Abuse until they are safe to process the hurt and pain

Long term effects from sexual abuse are varied and complex – it is different for each adult that had to cope to survive. 

EMOTIONAL REACTIONS

  • Emotions such as fear, shame, humiliation, guilt, and self–blame are common and lead to depression and anxiety.
  • Symptoms of posttraumatic stress (PTSD)
  • Survivors may experience intrusive or recurring thoughts of the abuse as well as nightmares or flashbacks.
  • Distorted self-perception
  • Survivors often develop a belief that they caused the sexual abuse and that they deserved it. These beliefs may result in self-destructive relationships

PHYSICAL EFFECTS NOT LIMITED TO

  • Chronic and diffuse pain
  • gastrointestinal issues IBS/stomach ulcers/chronic indigestion
  • increased risk of high blood pressure/heart disease and..
  • lower pain threshold
  • anxiety/depression
  • self-neglect
  • chronic pelvic pain
  • fear of pelvic exams
  • sleep disorders
  • insomnia/sleep apnea/night terrors
  • eating disorders
  • abuse of drugs/alcohol
  • smoking
  • inactive
  • physically obese

SEXUAL EFFECTS 

  • disturbances around sex
  • gynecologic problems
  • unhealthy view or avoidance of

BEHAVIORAL SIGNS

  • avoidance
  • substance misuse
  • harmful sexual behavior
  • self-harm
  • withdrawal and isolation

PTSD 

  • intrusive memories
  • flashbacks 
  • anxiety
  • sleeping issues
  • feeling on edge

ANXIETY

  • panic attacks
  • constant worry
  • low mood 
  • hopelessness
  • lack of interest 

DISSOCIATION

  • is common - feeling disconnected from oneself of the environment - manifesting as "OUT OF BODY" experiences of severe detachment

PERSONALITY DISORDERS

  • borderline personality disorder
  • unstable moods
  • unstable relationships

 

There is GREAT LIFE after discovery and disclosure.

You are NEVER ALONE, You are NEVER FORGOTTEN REACH OUT - GET THE HELP YOU DESERVE. 

There IS GREAT BEAUTY FOR YOU TO EXPERIENCE!

usa -National Sexual Assault Hotline- Available 24/7 

REACH OUT FOR HELP - DON'T BE AFRAID OF PROFESSIONAL THERAPY - GET A MEDICAL EVALUATION -JOIN SUPPORT GROUPS - FIND A GOOD SPACE - CONSIDER LEGAL ACTION after you are in a safe place 

Call or text 988LIFELINE.ORG  help 24/7

Text HOME to the Crisis Text Line  747141  help 24/7

Call 911 or your local emergency services IF you feel SAFE to do so. 

If you are helping another - PLEASE STAY WITH THEM UNTIL HELP ARRIVES - remove weapons or substances that can cause harm IF YOU CAN DO SO SAFELY 

If you are not in the same place as them, STAY WITH THEM ON THE PHONE UNTIL HELP ARRIVES.

RAINN's National Sexual Assault Hotline

 https://rainn.org/help-and-healing/hotline/

Department of Justice Resources for Victims and Survivors

https://www.justice.gov/ovw/resources-victims-and-survivorshttps://www.justice.gov/ovw/resources-victims-and-survivors

CRISIS TEXT LINE

https://www.crisistextline.org/topics/sexual-abuse/

Hotlines for Victims and Survivors

https://www.niwrc.org/hotlines-victims-and-survivors

Department of Defense Sexual Assault Prevention and Response Office

https://www.sapr.mil/dod-safe-helpline

Chat Line for survivors - domestic, dating, and or sexual violence

https://casamyrna.org/chat/

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